I don't write for money. I never have.
I write because the stories won't leave me alone. I write because somewhere out there, someone needs to see themselves in a character who turns their wounds into wisdom. I write because connection is the whole damn point.
But I'd be lying if I said it doesn't feel good to see proof that the words are landing.
So here's my first year as an actively publishing novelist, laid bare. No filters. No exaggeration. Just the real numbers from a real indie author figuring this out in real time.
The Numbers
Books Sold: 592 units across 8 titles
Kindle Unlimited Pages Read: 5,118
Spotify Streams (Music): 2,754
Bestseller Moment: The Spaces Between Us hit #1 in Literary Sagas on Amazon
Bookstore Q&A Views: 60+ people watched my Boulder Bookstore interview
Rebuilt Facebook Following: 131 followers (more on this in a minute)
New Found Family Members: At least 1 (and they are irreplaceable)
What the Numbers Actually Mean
Let me be honest with you: these numbers are small by industry standards.
I know authors who sell 592 books in a week. I know musicians whose singles get 2,754 streams in a day. I know influencers who gain 131 followers before breakfast.
But here's what I also know: every single one of these numbers represents a real person.
A real person who saw my cover and thought "maybe." A real person who read the blurb and thought "this might be for me." A real person who took a chance on an indie author they'd never heard of and gave my words space in their life.
That's not nothing. That's everything.
The Reviews That Made Me Cry
Some wins can't be measured in units sold.
In January 2026, a reader left this review for The Spaces Between Us:
"Wow! That's how I can begin to explain The Space Between Us. Zahra and Adrian's story is so relatable and uplifting. As a person who suffers from chronic pain and am in recovery this book intrigued me from page 1. The way the story goes through all the trials and tribulations of recovery and dealing with chronic illness is dead on. I absolutely loved this book."
I sat at my desk and cried. The good kind of crying.
Because this is why I write. Not for the sales numbers, though I won't pretend they don't matter. Not for the bestseller rankings, though that #1 spot felt pretty damn good. I write to create connection. To help people feel less alone. To offer representation and hope.
That reader saw themselves in Zahra. That's the win that matters.
And then there was a fellow author I met at a book signing who compared The Connectivity Hypothesis to Heinlein and Clarke. You can read the full story here, but the short version is: when a fellow author says your neurodivergent sci-fi belongs in conversation with the titans of the genre, your brain short circuits.
The Wins You Can't Put in a Spreadsheet
The Boulder Bookstore Interview
In late 2025, Boulder Bookstore invited me to do an author Q&A about The Spaces Between Us. They asked me questions about my work. It was recorded. They put it on YouTube.
Over 60 people have watched it.
I know that's not viral. I know that's not impressive by internet standards. But sitting there, answering questions about characters I created and themes I care about, being treated like a real author whose work matters enough to discuss... that felt special. That felt like proof that I belong at this table.
I want to do more of these. Many more.
The Friend I Made at a Book Festival
Sometimes the best wins walk right up to your booth.
At one of my 2025 events, someone approached me and asked, completely out of nowhere: "What does the color purple taste like?"
Without pausing, I said, "Grapes."
We've been friends ever since.
This person has become part of my found family: the people who show up, who get it, who make the lonely parts of this work feel less lonely. You can't put that in a sales report. But it might be the most valuable thing I gained all year.
The Hard Parts (Because I'm Not Going to Pretend There Weren't Any)
My original Facebook account got hacked. Years of connections, gone.
I had to rebuild from scratch. And not just rebuild the follower count... rebuild a community that actually supports me instead of tearing me down.
That 131 followers? Those are 131 people who aren't cruel. Who don't troll. Who engage with my work because they want to, not because they want to watch me fail.
After everything, building a community of genuine support feels like its own kind of victory.
What Kept Me Going
My daughter.
My husband.
My own stubborn refusal to quit.
And, slowly, learning to believe in myself without needing external validation to prove I'm allowed to exist.
That last one is still a work in progress. But 2025 taught me that I can do this. That my words do land. That there are people out there who need the stories I'm telling.
The Lesson
Keep going even when the numbers feel small BECAUSE connection matters more than sales.
Every book sold is a reader. Every page read is someone choosing to stay in your world. Every stream is someone letting your words into their ears. Every follower is someone who said "yes, I want more of this."
Those connections are the point. The numbers are just how we count them.
Looking Ahead to 2026
I've got Lawful Good and The Identity Debt in edits. I've got more events planned, more interviews I want to do, more words to write.
And I've got 592 readers who took a chance on me this year.
Here's to finding more in 2026.
🖤